Summer vacation is over. Those can be some very sobering and haunting words for a student and at times, a teacher. It means back to work and back to "discipline." Here are some tips for parents who want to help their children to have a constructive, productive and disciplined school year.
Parents, it is your role to prepare your child to be the best "learner" that he or she can be. What you say or don't say to your child will make all the difference in whether he or she is a great or poor student. Your continued input and influence is so critical to your child's success. Don't ever underestimate that. You are a driving force for your child's success. My mother, almost daily, reminded us that "You have to get your education, no one can take it from you once you get it." It was true. She made a tremendous impact on all of us. She is now gone, but her words will always live on in our hearts and in our thoughts.
Quick tips:
1. AUTHORITY: As a parent, decide what your view is of authority. If it is a "negative" one, figure out how you can reconcile them so that you can help your child to "respect" the authorities (teachers, principal, etc.) in his or her life. Without a healthy view of authority, your child will automatically "shut out" those who are there to direct him / her while in school.
2. BE THE ADULT: Don't be so quick to "side" with your child when a conflict comes up. You are the adult. You must remember that children (you were one) have a very limited perspective on life. They would like to have fun, shake off responsibility, and "get away with things." If the teacher calls you in for a conference, it must be important. Try to understand from the teacher, what the issue is. It takes time out of the teacher's schedule to meet with parents, they don't do it "just for fun or to get at a child" as some children try to tell their parents.
3. CONFLICT: If you have a "problem" with the teacher, try to discuss and resolve it as adult to adult. Avoid having your child in the middle of a dispute. That type of situation will just put an unnecessary "burden" on your child. Let your child be the child, you deal with the adult issues. This will help your child to be able to go back to the class and still "learn" from the teacher. Regardless of personality or style issues, the teacher still has a lot to offer your child.
4. BE PRESENT: Make regular (every other week or once a month) visits to the school. Stop in or volunteer to help in the school. Send an email to the teachers and encourage them to send you a "note" if there are any concerns or victories to be shared about your child. Most teachers are there teaching, because, they want to make a difference. They do want your child to succeed.
5. COMMUNICATION: Make it a habit to let your child talk about their school day. Don't just ask questions, let them talk about what was good, funny, unpleasant about the day. Create an atmosphere that lets them feel that it is safe to talk about whatever is happening at school. This way, when other things come up you can have a broader picture of what your child may be experiencing.
6. GADGETS AND GAMES: Decide the amount of time that you will let your child play games, watch television, text, be on the phone, be on Facebook, etc. Wow, I'm exhausted just writing these things down. It must be exhausting trying to keep track of all these things. Remember, you are the adult, you are the parent. You have to set boundaries for your child / children. If you don't, your child will be "lost" in those things and education or learning will be the furthest thing from their minds.
7. GET HELP: Talk to and spend time with people who are getting victories with their children. If you know a parent who has children who are focused and get their work done at school, get input from that parent. It could only help. Speak to "veteran" parents. Learn some good "old fashion" values from the wise parents from "back in the day." It can only help. The point is, talk to people who are WHERE YOU WANT TO BE as a parent. They are good resources. Ask your teachers, especially those who are parents they will tell you what can make a difference. Read a book on parenting. The point is, ask for help!
8. BEDTIME: Set an appropriate bedtime for your child. They need at leas 8 hours of sleep. Don't let them stay up all night doing WHATEVER and then expect them to function at school the next day.
9. HOMEWORK: Help them do the work. If you have difficulty helping them, get help. If you find the homework is overwhelming your child, get help. Talk to their teacher / principal. The point is, do something.
10. INSPIRE: Find ways to inspire your child. Help your child dream of possibilities for the future. Help your child see the benefits of being smart, being intelligent, being a leader. Help your child to develop self-awareness and worth. Help your child understand that as an individual, he or she can make a HUGE DIFFERENCE in the world. Look at videos, read books about people who made a difference in the world. Because, in school, too often, their peers treat them as "uncool" and worthless if they seek to do well and be excellent. Help your child believe that excellence and doing good work can only help him or her to be his / her best for the future.
I leave you with this quote: Train a child in the way that he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it. (Proverb 22:6)
Showing posts with label education. Show all posts
Showing posts with label education. Show all posts
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Making Sense: Education and Budget Crisis in New Jersey
As a teacher I have heard many theories and conclusions as to why New Jersey is in the "mess" that it is experiencing. As well, I have also seen assignments of blame attributed to teachers, their unions (which for the most part represent the teachers) and other public sector employees. It appears that it is easier to vilify a sector of the population than to unite and use our best talents to formulate sound and humane solutions.
Amazingly, I have not heard nor am I aware of much blame assigned to the policy makers, "movers and shakers," of the past (regardless of administration or political affiliation). It appears, in my opinion, that the focus is on getting the teachers to cede the few incentives that were adopted to legitimize the profession in our most recent history.
Totally, I agree that "If one suffers, then all suffer." I think it would be impractical to assert and maintain that there should not be any compromise, whatsoever. Compromise is one thing, but "scapegoating" is something entirely different. I have a very simple definition of scapegoating from Wikipedia: Scapegoating is the practice of singling out one child, employee, member of a group of peers, ethnic or religious group, or country for unmerited negative treatment orblame.[1] It appears that New Jersey is being "united" against and at the expense of the teachers. The very people who have supported, inspired and motivated so many in New Jersey to become scientists, lawyers, teachers, nurses, technicians and so much more, are being treated as an "enemy of the State." They are, in fact, builders of the State!
There has been a very negative, beligerent and intolerant mood created in the "Garden State." A mood that fosters dishonor, ingratitude and "destruction." I am amazed that after much has been done to ligitimize the field of education in New Jersey and the United States that so much is being done to undermine it in the current decade. Historically, teachers have served as a backbone for any nation that wants to compete in the world stage. Without the knowledge and dedication that teachers possess, a city, a state, or a country will not advance in the manner that will be significant enough to make it a viable resource in the world community.
This is not a simple subject, I know that. It is not a subject that should be treated carelessly or with frivolity. When one decides to address teachers, professionals whom so many children look to for guidance and solace, one must see to it that he or she does not undermine the very sector that serves many times as a hope and a source of consistency for so many of our youth.
When a child has what they perceive to be "injustice" at home they look forward to the "fairness" of the teacher. When the child has a drug addicted mother/father or both at home, he or she looks to the stability and consistency of the teacher, the professional. When a child feels hopeless and at times suicidal he or she gets hope when the teacher just shows care and concern, first thing in the morning. When parents threathen divorce or follow through with such an act, the child can often feel secure that he or she will find that teacher that is "always there" for them. I can go on with many more, but the point is clear.
You don't want to undermine the very people that serve significantly to keep the young generation, population, motivated and hopeful while they navigate the sometimes treacherous and uncertain roads to responsibility and adulthood. Most of our children have a high esteem for their teachers. When disparaging, careless and unfounded accusations are made against their teachers, it makes them even more insecure and distrustful of the "adult community."
There will be disagreements and that is a good thing. There will be heated conflicts, that's fine also. There will be accusations and a host of other unpleasant things. But most importantly, I ask that all of us really consider the long term effects on the teaching profession in New Jersey and the children who are served by its professionals.
Teachers have always been important to the community. Are they the most important people? No, everyone who lends a hand makes the community better by their contributions. Younger teachers learn from older ones. I learned a lot from senior teachers around me. Let's uphold these teachers and not treat them like a "disease" that we need to eradicate because others have wasted valuable resources on their friends and associates.
Let's be sensible as we address the issue of education reform and the budget crisis. Let's remember that we should not be shortsighted but consider the long term psychological impact of our actions and reactions to what goes on in the public. Let's remember the children who often find refuge in the positive interactions that they have with their teachers. Also, as we move forward with reform, lets see to it that licensed New Jersey teachers (young and old) are at the forefront in making recommendations for what will help in the classroom. Hopefully, the policy makers have been in the classroom recently or are working very closely with teachers, aids, parents who are "on the ground" and can give "real time" accounts of what the needs are in our schools and classrooms. Let's make sense as we try to save cents.
Amazingly, I have not heard nor am I aware of much blame assigned to the policy makers, "movers and shakers," of the past (regardless of administration or political affiliation). It appears, in my opinion, that the focus is on getting the teachers to cede the few incentives that were adopted to legitimize the profession in our most recent history.
Totally, I agree that "If one suffers, then all suffer." I think it would be impractical to assert and maintain that there should not be any compromise, whatsoever. Compromise is one thing, but "scapegoating" is something entirely different. I have a very simple definition of scapegoating from Wikipedia: Scapegoating is the practice of singling out one child, employee, member of a group of peers, ethnic or religious group, or country for unmerited negative treatment orblame.[1] It appears that New Jersey is being "united" against and at the expense of the teachers. The very people who have supported, inspired and motivated so many in New Jersey to become scientists, lawyers, teachers, nurses, technicians and so much more, are being treated as an "enemy of the State." They are, in fact, builders of the State!
There has been a very negative, beligerent and intolerant mood created in the "Garden State." A mood that fosters dishonor, ingratitude and "destruction." I am amazed that after much has been done to ligitimize the field of education in New Jersey and the United States that so much is being done to undermine it in the current decade. Historically, teachers have served as a backbone for any nation that wants to compete in the world stage. Without the knowledge and dedication that teachers possess, a city, a state, or a country will not advance in the manner that will be significant enough to make it a viable resource in the world community.
This is not a simple subject, I know that. It is not a subject that should be treated carelessly or with frivolity. When one decides to address teachers, professionals whom so many children look to for guidance and solace, one must see to it that he or she does not undermine the very sector that serves many times as a hope and a source of consistency for so many of our youth.
When a child has what they perceive to be "injustice" at home they look forward to the "fairness" of the teacher. When the child has a drug addicted mother/father or both at home, he or she looks to the stability and consistency of the teacher, the professional. When a child feels hopeless and at times suicidal he or she gets hope when the teacher just shows care and concern, first thing in the morning. When parents threathen divorce or follow through with such an act, the child can often feel secure that he or she will find that teacher that is "always there" for them. I can go on with many more, but the point is clear.
You don't want to undermine the very people that serve significantly to keep the young generation, population, motivated and hopeful while they navigate the sometimes treacherous and uncertain roads to responsibility and adulthood. Most of our children have a high esteem for their teachers. When disparaging, careless and unfounded accusations are made against their teachers, it makes them even more insecure and distrustful of the "adult community."
There will be disagreements and that is a good thing. There will be heated conflicts, that's fine also. There will be accusations and a host of other unpleasant things. But most importantly, I ask that all of us really consider the long term effects on the teaching profession in New Jersey and the children who are served by its professionals.
Teachers have always been important to the community. Are they the most important people? No, everyone who lends a hand makes the community better by their contributions. Younger teachers learn from older ones. I learned a lot from senior teachers around me. Let's uphold these teachers and not treat them like a "disease" that we need to eradicate because others have wasted valuable resources on their friends and associates.
Let's be sensible as we address the issue of education reform and the budget crisis. Let's remember that we should not be shortsighted but consider the long term psychological impact of our actions and reactions to what goes on in the public. Let's remember the children who often find refuge in the positive interactions that they have with their teachers. Also, as we move forward with reform, lets see to it that licensed New Jersey teachers (young and old) are at the forefront in making recommendations for what will help in the classroom. Hopefully, the policy makers have been in the classroom recently or are working very closely with teachers, aids, parents who are "on the ground" and can give "real time" accounts of what the needs are in our schools and classrooms. Let's make sense as we try to save cents.
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New Jersey Rally of May 22, 2010
Young ones making their voices heard.